Thoughtful Gift

Joe and Amanda’s wedding was Fabulous!! I will be posting pictures soon.

In their incredible thoughtfulness, their gift to me (for helping and being the sister and all that) was 3 books. One was a book of quotes of inspiration – possibly to be used in the cards I make. One was Secrets of Millionaire Moms and the other is called How to Start a Home Based Craft Business. Super thoughtful and inspirational.

I’m a bit of a cynic, so while I was curious about the Millionare Moms book, I was also skeptical. I don’t really have any intentions of becoming a millionaire. I’m not even sure that I really think I can make any money on my cards. But I started reading, and was delighted to find some encouragement.

The author, Tamara Monosoff, gets right to it – discussing the fears that women typically have when they think they have a good idea, but they are hesitant to do anything with it. Sounds familiar. Then she starts talking about fears women typically have concerning money and power and success. Intriguing. Her book highlights 17 moms who have found great success with their ideas, many of them starting with nothing. So even if I don’t want to take all of her advice, the subjects of her book are interesting.

But it really has been inspiring. It’s made me take a second look at my goals and plans for the next few years. If I’m not going back to work until after I’m done having kids (and what does that mean?), what will I do until then? Certainly my children will keep me busy, but can I really still identify myself as an English teacher? Couldn’t I be something else in the meantime? I started this idea PagesbyAngie, because I love creating things that bring encouragement and joy to the recipients. Couldn’t this be more than an occasional behavior?

So at one point she refers to “redirect[ing] the course of your life.” The course of my life has been to teach English – for a long time. As a mother of young children, I feel strongly that I am needed in another direction – as a mom closer to home. Yet, I have still thought of myself as a high school English teacher. But the word REDIRECTION is powerful and is helping me to understand. Just because teaching is important to me and is a part of who I am, doesn’t mean it’s the only thing I am. This is a realization I’ve been coming to understand more and more since we moved, but I see that it still exists powerfully enough to get in the way of new ideas. How long will it be before I teach high school English again? If I plan to sub meanwhile, and take care of my kids, why couldn’t I also work seriously on becoming something completely different than an English teacher?

This may not seem like it’s a big deal, but self-concept is kindof huge. When we perceive ourselves as one thing, we can build a box around ourselves. These boxes can be good boxes – I love being an English teacher – but this box isn’t doing much for me right now. I think I need to work on getting outside of the box, to see what else I can be right now.